After one day and two nights in Colombo, I was beginning to feel what I think many visitors to this storied place feel: the overwhelming need to get the hell out of there! It's noisy, crowded, and the atmosphere is heavy vehicle exhaust. Many guide books and tourist sites gamely try to play up Colombo's positive features, but it's a lost cause. Your rational self recognizes the city's culture and its exotic essence, but you still want to leave.
We had arranged for Musharraf
to pick us up the next morning at 9:30.
The trip would take somewhere between six to seven hours. I was in the shower at 8:00 when my phone
rang. It was Musharraf. He was downstairs and wanted to talk. I dried off, and went to see what was
up. He had a request. Since it was a holiday, would I mind if he
brought a van and his family? They had
never been to Trincomalee. No
problem! I really liked him, and thought
it would be fun.
Securing a van, and getting
the family together took a while, and we didn’t hit the road until close to
10:30. Our crew consisted of Musharraf’s
wife, his sister, her son and daughter, and Musharraf’s younger brother. His kid was apparently a slug-a-bed and
remained home with Grandma and Grandpa.
It was a grand road trip,
which took us into the mountains. The
road was very curvy and mostly under construction. If you’ve ever traveled on roads in Asia, you
experience a more adventurous style of driving.
Passing on blind corners is a common occurrence, and I’ve grown
accustomed to the practice. Somehow, you
don’t die, and it really is the only way to get around the dump trucks. Unlike China, there are a lot of traffic cops
everywhere, and the speed limit is strictly enforced.
Sri Lanka is a beautiful
place, and sacred places abound. We
passed countless temples, stupa, shrines, churches and mosques. Lots of jungle and farms too!
We stopped at one roadside
stand for some coconut milk and when we got hungry, we stopped for some rotti
at a roadside stand. Damn monkeys came
out of the jungle and joined us, expecting a handout. So did a Hindu woman who preached at us about
some things I didn’t understand. She
didn’t go on too long, and Musharraf, gave her some money as we were leaving.
Our traveling companions at the four star rotti stand.
Rotti on the grill.
Rotti with nuclear chili paste.
Damn monkeys.
As we came out of the
mountains the land flattened out, and there were clusters of brush and trees
amidst some very deep grass. The grass
was trampled in places, and looked as though something had been grazing. Sure enough, we caught a few glimpses of
elephants. Cool! Also a few peacocks. I kept looking for crocodiles, but no luck.
We stopped by a large
reservoir late in the day. We bought ice
cream cones for everyone from a guy with an ice cream tuktuk. We watched fishermen in their boats and a
family taking care of laundry and bathing in the lake. I still didn’t see any crocodiles, which was
good luck for the bathers.
Laundry and bath time
Fishing boats
No elephants in the rice fields
During the drive we talked
religion, politics, culture, business, sports, family, food, and most anything
else that came to mind. It was a great
day that ended when we arrived at our lodging in Trincomalee. I promised to call when we returned to
Colombo. We’d have dinner at their
house. We bid farewell with hugs, and
looked forward to seeing them again.
We’ve been here in China for
seven years. Kind of amazing when you
think about it. Obama has almost
completed two terms, and entire social trends have come and gone in the US without
my noticing. But a lot of things have
changed here, too.
Smart phones are everywhere
and almost everyone has one. Just like
everywhere in the world, you see people hunched over their devices chatting, or
surfing, or doing whatever.
Whatever.
Traffic has gotten much
worse, but drivers are a little less bad.
A few years back the head of the DMV here was busted for corruption. In order to get a driver’s license you had to
pay him an extra stipend. In return, the
driver’s test consisted of little more that fogging a mirror with your breath. Drivers have to take a fairly rigorous test
now so the competence level has risen a bit.
If you are concerned that the cherished stereotype you have regarding
Chinese drivers is no longer valid, don’t worry, they still suck, just less so.
Gas powered motorbikes have
been replaced with electric ones, and there are a lot more of these, too. The three wheeled “sanmou” taxis are gone,
outlawed, banished to smaller cities. I
miss those; they were an excellent alternative to taxis and buses.
We have Uber now, or a
Chinese version of it. (Chuber?) It’s very convenient during the late
afternoon rush hour, since that’s the time that the taxi company changes to the
evening shift. The busiest time of the
day, and they are completely absent. I
never could understand the reasoning behind that. An English friend of mine, who has been
doing business here for many years, loves to say that business decisions here
are frequently not about making money. I
think this is a pretty good example.
To use the Chuber service,
you absolutely need a Chinese person to secure the ride. It involves far too much fluency in Chinese
writing, geography, speaking, banking, and internet for any occidental to
attempt. It has greatly enhanced getting
around, though, and it’s great to see the idiot taxi company take a hit. In Guangzhou, where the taxi drivers are
especially larcenous, it’s pretty common to see a lot of empty cabs now.
Internet shopping, which only
a couple of years ago was distrusted by all but a few hearty souls, has gone
batshit crazy here.
It’s a hectic place, stuffed
with too many people and sometimes one needs a break, so we decided to head to
Sri Lanka for the winter holiday.
I was able to get an
excellent price on a flight from Hong Kong to Colombo, with only one
drawback. The first leg took us two
hours in the opposite direction to Shanghai.
It made for a longer trip.
However, we finally were going to Shanghai, the shiny, modern, model
city by the sea! The airport must rival
Hong Kong’s for cutting edge grooviness!!
Too bad we only had a 90 minute layover.
I hoped for a little time for some boutique shopping, or making the scene
in a trendy coffee shop. The reality was
jarringly different.
First of all, China Eastern
Airlines apparently is in arrears with their terminal fees since we deplaned
down a stairway to an awaiting shuttle about half a mile from the
terminal. The temperature was about 30
degrees, the air was foul and gritty, and there was a stiff 25 mph wind blowing
even more frozen, toxic fumes into our faces.
The shuttle was unheated.
Upon arriving at the
terminal, we were directed to the international transit lounge, which is a
bleak, drafty box, designed in a Cultural Revolution motif, with comfortless
seating and a vending machine that dispensed cold drinks. A view of the smoggy tarmac enhanced experience,
making the anticipation of departing that much keener.
Fortunately, our flight was
on time. We boarded another unheated
shuttle, and eventually settled into our plane, only to discover that our
upcoming seven hour flight was to be made with no personal movie service. They just had old school, miniscule, drop
down screens with a Chinese soap opera and illegible subtitles.
The high point of the flight
was the special announcement at the beginning informing passengers that they
should maintain order and behave in a civilized fashion. A long list of forbidden actions was given
which included, smoking, shouting, jostling, using cell phones, and grabbing
attendants. The announcement concluded with a warning
that extreme misbehavior would be dealt with in a legal manner.This announcement apparently is necessary to address
the numerous episodes of extreme behavior by Chinese travelers that have caused
Chinese tourists to be rated the worst in the world. I did notice that the flight staff looked
weary and stressed.
Colombo
We arrived in Colombo after
dark, so there wasn’t much to see, other than a breathtaking sunset just before
landing.
Colombo airport is a no
frills, everything you need, kind of place.
You can change money, hit an ATM, or buy a sim card. Definitely get the sim card. You will use it and it’s dirt cheap. There is a taxi booth that will arrange for a
nice, modern vehicle to take you wherever you need to go.
The car was new and
modern. This was to be our last mode of
transportation that was new and modern for a while. It even had GPS, although it was apparent
that the driver did not know how to use it, when he had trouble finding our
hotel. He had trouble finding our hotel
for quite a while, asking for directions from at least half a dozen different
tuktuk drivers. We went around many
different streets and alley-like streets.
I showed him my Google map, but map reading was a skill he lacked. He eventually lucked onto the right street, a
dark and dodgy looking place to be sure.
This was the Port View Hotel. The
clerk there seemed pretty clueless, but I showed him the printout of our paid
reservation, which seemed like enough proof for him, so he gave us a key and we
went to our room. It was really nice,
with a world class bathroom equipped with a mega shower.
Unfortunately, our room was
facing the street, which although not very busy at night, was frequented by
trucks which enjoyed honking their air horns.
I went downstairs to find that the dweeb from the previous night had
been replaced by a lovely young woman who exuded competence and who gladly
allowed us to change our room for one in the back, which proved to be much
quieter and had a deck with an interesting view of some roofs.
Our first order of business
of the day was to get to the train station to book our tickets to Trincomalee,
which is a coastal city on the other side of the island, about 360 km
away. All guidebooks and people who
travel this country insist that the old trains are the way to go. We stepped out of the hotel to a street that
was a solid river of traffic, and nothing but a row of trucks and small
warehouses on our side. I was planning
on walking to the station, but opted for a tuktuk ride instead. This was where I was to learn the first thing
about Sri Lankan communication. I told the driver where I wanted to go, and how
much I wanted to pay. He shook his
head. I told him again, and he shook his
head. I repeated myself and said,
“OK?” He said, “OK”. Sri Lankans do not nod their heads for “yes”. Instead, they shake them from side to side in
a manner similar to what most people in the world do, when they mean “no”. I was able to make this same error in
communicating a couple of more times until someone explained this anomaly to
me.
We got to the train station,
only to be told that there were no more tickets to Trincomalee for the next
day. This did not make me happy, since I
was looking forward to a train ride, and I had already booked a room
there. A tuktuk driver approached and
asked where we were going. They do this
a lot, sometimes to give a ride and sometimes just to help. People here are very friendly, and being
approached like this is common. I
explained what happened, and he told me he could arrange for a car to take us
for about $120. This was an interesting
proposal, but not one I was willing to agree to with a seedy looking guy who
was missing a few teeth that I had just met in front of a train station in a Third World city.
The fabled Colombo Fort Train Station
When we had gotten the taxi
the previous night at the airport, the man there had told us that their agency
hired cars for the day, and he put his phone number on the receipt. We headed back to the hotel, so I could give
him a call. We walked back, which was
somewhat interesting. We live in a
chaotic Asian city in China. It’s kind
of a training ground for getting around places like Colombo. When you cross the street in Zhanjiang, you
feel like you are cheating Death. In
Colombo, Death appears to have better odds.
We managed to get back to the hotel without dying, and try as I may, I
could not find the receipt with the car agency’s phone number.
I got online to research our
options, and found a recommendation of a wonderful travel agency, at a
reputable hotel that could arrange bus or car transport and I decided to give
it a try. I would prefer a nice air
conditioned bus. We got a tuktuk to the reputable hotel, and I
noticed a good dozen travel agencies across the street. We wandered across the quiet street and saw
that these were all air travel agencies.
Just as we began to recross the street, we were approached by a
well-dressed man whom we discussed our situation with. He had a tuktuk and offered to take us to the
bus station in order to help us secure our tickets. He informed us that the next day was Sri
Lanka’s Independence Day, so travel options could be limited. Arriving at the bus station we found that
this was so. The only air conditioned
buses did not leave until the following night, and I did not want to spend the
night on the bus, or the whole next day in Colombo, which was a place that was
starting to get on my nerves.
I brought up the car option,
and he informed us that he could drive us for less than the shady guy offered. We agreed to this, and decided to spend the
rest of the day getting a tour of some sites with him.
A friend of ours, who has
traveled extensively in Sri Lanka said that we must go to the Galle Face Hotel
for a cocktail, and to watch the sunset.
It’s the sort of thing Rudyard Kipling would do. We asked our guy to take us there, which
resulted in our sitting in horrifying holiday traffic for about half an
hour. He told us it would be this way
all along the waterfront, and perhaps we might want to see some different
sights. Good idea, Dude!
We first stopped at a Hindu
temple, a complete acid trip of a building, complete with a snake charmer who
offered to pose for pictures for money.
Our guide told him to piss off, but I kinda wanted to watch, even though
our Dude told me the snake was defanged and the charmer a charlatan.
A Bevy of Divinities
He then took us to the
incredible Gangaramaya Buddhist temple.
It’s a fascinating place, overflowing with gaudy wealth---gems, statues,
gold, an old Rolls Royce. Kind of a mini
Vatican for Buddhists. There were so
many pieces of jewelry and gems that much of it was just heaped in glass cases,
and there was wealth of statuary jammed into places, not unlike an overpriced
Eastern flea market. Just as Jesus
Christ embraced poverty and eschewed worldly possessions, so did Buddha. And just like the Catholics, Buddhists love
to pile up wealth at many of their places of worship. I guess it’s just their way of saying that
they will need a few more millennia of study and prayer before they “get
it”. The irony was not lost on me.
Copper panels that require frequent polishing, an excellent meditative activity.
Nothing demonstrates a simple, holy life like sapphires.
This was a sacred elephant, apparently holy enough to stuff.
Like Oprah, Buddha's weight fluctuated.
These crows are everywhere in Colombo. This one must be sacred.
After a bit more touring, shopping,
and idling in traffic, I asked our Dude, whose name is Musharraf, to take us to
the place he likes to eat, and he did. It’s
a large cafeteria style place, with long tables, and lots of patrons. We had rotti, which a kind of pancake that
you can dip in all kinds of spicy concoctions, or roll goodies inside of. Sri Lankan tortillas. We also were introduced to Sri Lankan ginger
beer, which is nonalcoholic, not too sweet, and has a generous amount of
ginger. I really like that drink!
We then headed back to our
hotel, which Musharraf also had a difficult time locating, although he managed
to find it in a much quicker time than the fancy airport guy did. We arrived to find the front door locked and
a note taped to it saying to call this number.
Fortunately, I had a phone and a sim card, otherwise we would have been
stuck on a dark unsafe street in a shithole Third World neighborhood. I called, and the clerk answered the door
almost immediately. I guess he was just
in a back office enjoying some recreational internet activity. For this reason, I do not recommend the Port
View Hotel, unless you have a phone, and don’t mind being on a crappy street.
